THREE. INCREDIBLE. TRAILERS.

Okay, I lied. The Spider-Man one is only sort of okay. And I have the feeling that I’m gonna loathe that annoying fat kid even more than I do right now.

OTOH, the next movie looks great! Or rather, looks like it could be great. It could also be a tedious, over-CGI’d mess that stupefies rather than entertains.

And, of course, the last season of Game of Thrones. All this trailer reminds me of, is that the series is about 1000x better than whatever George will eventually come up with.

So exciting!

The Inhumans…

Marvel’s next hit TV show… The Inhumans.

Or perhaps not. HERE’S THE TEASER!

Well, that was completely underwhelming.

The Inhumans are one of Marvel’s weirder group of supers, and that’s before Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D got ahold of them. You can be forgiven for not knowing who the hell they are.

So, I present this QUICK REFRESHER COURSE!

Yes. A woman with prehensile hair and a man who can’t speak lest he nuke a city with the sound of his voice.

We’ll see.

TWO—Count ‘Em, Two—Terrible Trailers!

Two trailers came out today, and they both look AWFUL. First up: THE DEFENDERS!

Someone smack that “immortal Iron Fist”, because he sounds like a whiny little punk. All in all, I’m got getting positive vibes from this one.

And now… THE DARK TOWER!

Listen, assholes, ROLAND DOES NOT NEED TO BE CONVINCED TO GO TO THE TOWER BY SOME SNOT-NOSED PUNK KID.

That’s the entire POINT of his character.

You’ve taken a colorful and original character, and turned him into another cookie-cutter “Reluctant Hero”, refusing the call to adventure. SAVE ME FROM SAVE THE CAT. Save us all.

The movie looks resoundingly generic. What a waste.